Attachment, Relationships and Self Worth

Many people find themselves caught in recurring patterns of self-doubt, people pleasing, fear of rejection or relationship difficulties. Therapy can help you understand where these patterns come from and build greater confidence, connection and emotional security.

Do you find yourself stuck in the same relationship patterns?

Perhaps you worry about being rejected, need frequent reassurance, find it difficult to trust others, or feel anxious when someone seems distant. You might become highly sensitive to criticism, struggle to express your needs, or find yourself putting other people's needs before your own.

These experiences can be confusing and exhausting, particularly when you understand logically that your fears may not reflect reality, yet still find yourself reacting in the same way.

Often, these patterns are connected to what psychologists call attachment.

How Attachment Affects Adult Life

Relationships

Repeated difficult patterns, fear of rejection, difficulty trusting others.

Self Esteem

Feeling not good enough, self-criticism, comparison.

Emotional Wellbeing

Anxiety, loneliness, reassurance seeking, low mood.

Do these experiences feel familiar?

  • You worry about being rejected or abandoned.

  • You need reassurance but still struggle to feel secure.

  • You put other people's needs before your own.

  • You find it difficult to trust others.

  • You overthink interactions and relationships.

  • You feel lonely even when surrounded by people.

What is attachment?

Attachment refers to the way we learn to relate to ourselves and others through our early experiences with important people in our lives.

Our early relationships can shape expectations about:

  • Whether other people can be trusted

  • Whether our needs matter

  • Whether it is safe to depend on others

  • Whether we are lovable and acceptable as we are

These expectations often continue to influence relationships in adulthood, even when we are no longer aware of where they came from.

What you might gain from therapy

  • Feel more secure in relationships

  • Become less dependent on reassurance

  • Build healthier boundaries

  • Develop greater self-worth

  • Build deeper connections with others

  • Feel more confident expressing your needs

How I Work

Many people arrive in therapy feeling frustrated by patterns they have been struggling with for years. You may understand why you react in certain ways, yet still find yourself worrying about rejection, seeking reassurance, putting other people's needs first, or withdrawing when relationships feel difficult.

My approach draws on Cognitive Analytic Therapy (CAT), EMDR and other evidence-based therapies. Together, we explore how these patterns developed, how they continue to affect your life today, and what helps to maintain them.

The goal is not simply to reduce symptoms, but to develop a deeper understanding of yourself and create more satisfying ways of relating to both yourself and other people.

Support For Young Adults and Students

Many of the people I work with are young adults navigating a period of significant change. Leaving home, starting university, building relationships, beginning a career, and figuring out who you want to be can all bring uncertainty and pressure.

Attachment difficulties often become particularly noticeable during this stage of life. Concerns about belonging, rejection, self-worth and relationships can feel especially painful when friendships and romantic relationships are becoming increasingly important.

I have particular expertise in working with young adults and students, helping them understand these patterns and develop greater confidence, security and self-belief.

If you're struggling with self-esteem, relationship difficulties or recurring patterns that feel hard to change, therapy may help you make sense of what's going on and move towards a more secure and fulfilling way of relating to yourself and others.